Wednesday, May 12, 2010

...I have bad days too...and my thoughts about it!

This morning I am SICK for the 3rd morning in a row.
Not morning sickness...in the I'm pregnant kind of a way...so don't ask!
Just the worst cold, flu that has ever happened.
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To add: I got a call at about 8:00 a.m. from my landscaper. He was planning on arriving momentarily to go over planter dimensions and the size of my child's soon-to-be sand box.
I was stuffed, sore throat, whiney, mad at the world and my child smelled like a giant butt.
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Did I bathe him yesterday? Can't remember.
Where was that smell coming from anyways? Was it his feet...his breath maybe?
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See---I took 2 blue NIGHTIME cold pills at about 2:00 p.m. yesterday afternoon hoping that I wouldn't wake until Jarom was home and serving me dinner...but it had the opposite effect. I have always had a MENTAL BLOCK against taking naps during the day.
How unproductive is that?
Jarom doesn't get to take a nap?
Oh--the guilt I feel if I do.
It's simply not worth it:)
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My landscaper arrived and...
I threw on a sweatshirt and hiked through the mud that is currently my yard. I tried to "IMAGINE" (and I must add that I do not have one ounce of an imagination) what a planter that was 15 ft. in diameter would look like...how big a wellspire spruce would grow, etc. I would have preferred to be doing anything else at the moment...but I was also super excited that we were making progress.
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This is when I heard horrifically high pitched screams coming from inside my house. I knew immediately (as most mothers do) what was wrong...just by the shear pitch and volume of his cry...I knew. He thought I'd left him. He didn't know I was outside. He didn't know were I was and I'm pretty sure the entire block heard him hyperventilate.
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I ran inside and grabbed him....reasurred him that I wouldn't leave and begged him to keep watching cartoons. No can do! HE Of COURSE...insisted on being glued to my side.
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Perfect. Great. Wonderful.
Me, Sick, Can't breath, carrying 40+ pound half naked child wrapped in blanket, coughing up a lung, hiking through muddy back yard, designing landscape with man staring at me in what can only be described as COMPLETE shock. It is moments like this when I ask myself "what would I do if I had more. Kids that is! I am only ONE FREAKING PERSON!!!!"
I was sooooo onry. Undescribably onry.
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My child then announced that he need to poop.
I let him in the house...and he did what was only to be expected.
FREAKED OUT.
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I placed him on the pot...and ran outside as to not keep my landscaper waiting and witnessing our utter disfunction. Approx. 2 minutes later...my child came out the front door, in the freezing cold, naked from the waist down, bawling his head off...that I needed to WIPE HIS BUTT!
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Have I ever got in the car and left him all alone before? Why was he acting like some traumatized, abused child? The screams...oh the screams.
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I put on a smile and finished up my little chat with a "can you come back tomorrow?" and went into my house to hide. Oh...and wipe his BUTT.
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He is currently in Time-Out...and may be able to get out when Jarom get's home from work this evening:) We've had a few little talks about "Patience" since I'm pretty sure the child has no ability to comprehend that anyone exists or has needs except him.
I guess that's called : 3 years old syndrome.
It's hit our house in full speed this week...I'm afraid.
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I have only enough energy to draw 1 bath today...so the great risk of traumatizing my child is something I'm going to take: he's getting in with me. The only thing that can help me at this moment is a LONG soak in the jet tub.
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I have also been contemplating a discussion with a friend this morning. One in which we bounced back the thought that BLOGS ocassionally distort reality. They make lives look too blessed, too good, too perfect. I guess this is true. Since I, for example, don't make a habit of mentioning little things like when I went ballistic last night at 7:05 when Biggest Loser was supposed to come on and my COMCAST box decided to freeze! Tears were shed...Jarom was frantically trying to fix it before a vein burst in my face:) It was ugly. A bad moment.
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We ALL have them. That's a no brainer. It's our responsiblity as adults to KNOW they exist...even though we don't see them or witness them firsthand.
Nobody's life is perfect. Without trials or stress or fights with their husband!
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Nobody wakes up and looks in the mirror and thinks "Dang...I look good"...but instead grabs the flub that is hanging pinched from between your garment lines and the waist of your sweat pants and thinks "WHYYYYYY MEEEE?!?"
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I say this because...I have many many blogs I look at...and love. Most, if not all, claim to be "REAL" or "HONEST" and they sometimes are...but MOST THE TIME...we, bloggers, moms, humans...choose to be positive. We choose to take the time to post or write or express about special moments, exciting news, little vacations!
....and we should...
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We all should remember one small thing in the meantime. While we are browsing....and bloghopping that is! We ALL have bad days. Me included. We are all human...and living a PERFECTLY, FLAWLESS life in which we look like a million bucks, make a million bucks (ha!) and parent like a million bucks is only going to happen in the life after this one.
Not here on planet earth.
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Today sucks at my house. I don't wish to make it all look PERFECT...because it's far from.
However, I Do CHOOSE to highlight the positive.
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Maybe tomorrow will be better!
...if it is....I may take the time to post about it:)
You do that too, deal?!?
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I best be going. I need to brush my teeth...since it's noon.
....Jaxson...well, he's getting scrubbed til he smells like a human again!
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Love, Me

13 comments:

Kyle and Janel said...

I am with you 100% on blogging the good stuff. Sometimes I wonder why I don't write all the bad stuff down too. Usually it is because I don't want to remember it, and sometimes it is because when it is a bad day, I never have the desire to sit at a computer for my free time. i usually want to eat and veg infront of the TV.

Amanda said...

Oh Kristin you make me laugh! If the BL thing ever happens again, fear not I will have it recorded as well. Good luck with your day! It has gotta be all uphill from where you've been! Chat with ya soon!

Sabrina said...

I've had days just like that Kristin! Thanks for reminding me that it happens to other mothers too.

The Wells Family said...

kristin...what would i do without your blog?!? it really is the only one that i look forward to reading everyday!! this whole "perfect" blog thing is so true. i am guilty of it. big time. sometimes i have to take a step back from blogs because i see all the things that other people are doing and wonder how in the world they have time to do it all. i barely have enough time in the day for my house chores, food prep and taking care of the kids...forget about being creative...which i am DYING to have time for. i am just too dang tired. and seriously....MOST days i never have time for myself, which means living in sweats and no make-up. it is pretty sad when i actually DO get ready and bobby asks me if it is church today! ahhh! anyways...thanks for the post. LOVE IT!

Ktbug said...

"and my child smelled like a giant butt."

LOL. You seriously crack me up! I think I busted a seam with this one.

Kristin said...

i love you katie. Your comment made me laugh harder:) promise.

deb-you are sweet. Glad someone looks at it!

amanda-walk with me and get me skinny and then teach me how to make lemon bars, deal?

janel- your done with school! Wahoo!

Sabrina- I always look forward to your comments:)

allegra said...

your posts are always awesome. i roll reading them. especially today. the giant butt really had me laughing out loud, no joke. and why was it so funny to me? because max's butt smelled the same way today. scratch that... for the past month! mainly because he's been peeing his pants constantly lately and i can't ever keep him smelling good. boys just reeak all the time. lol. i wish i could be more honest like you in blogging. i try to, but when i write a negative post i erase it and think no one will want to hear me whine. but really... they do! everyone needs to hear that others are human and normal, and that's what i love about yours! keep it up.

allegra said...

p.s. feel better!!! i hate being sick. hope it passes real quick.

Brandy said...

I'm a stalker of yours, LOVE your blog and love your honesty! I have a question for you and your awesomely cool blog, how do you get your photos so big?? Thanks!

Andrea said...

I loved this post about things not being perfect all the time, especially because it seems like YOU always have everything together and running perfectly 100% of the time! This was refreshing:)

Allyson said...

HA HA HA HA. I hope your birthday is a much better, more relaxing day.:) Have a wonderful one!

Tara and Andrew said...

Kris, this was an AWESOME post. I have a hard time with the world of blogging when everything looks so peachy. Because life---for the most part---is not like that! I posted a picture of my son in time-out one time and have loved that I did that because that is my life. Everyday:) We do have bad moments sometimes and need to remember them to know that it will probably happen again on the next kid. But we will survive and life just gets better right? Love you! :)

The Arnall Family said...

I did it! I made a blog in honor of our conversation! I had a great time chatting with you the other day. I'm coming to Utah in a few weeks and I'll be stopping by for a lesson if you are up for company! Have a great day!