Sunday, July 15, 2012

The Twins Birth Story:)

Mason and London
Born May 23, 2012

It's been very challenging to put into words such a HUGE experience.

I've come to the conclusion that no matter how hard I try...I won't be able to properly express on paper the emotions and feelings that surround this experience for me. It will always be a defining moment in my that cannot be fully captured in words or pictures.
Moments this big can only be engraved on your heart.
That being said...I'm excited to record the good, bad and the ugly that led up to the BIG that someday my miracle babies can read my account of that special day and realize just how hard I fought to give them the best and most healthy start at life possible. I want them to KNOW and FEEL how much I loved them before I even saw their faces. I also want them to KNOW how awesome of a mother I am for giving up my body and my sanity and every dollar of disposable income for the next 10 years just to give them life:) Basically Mason and London...YOU OWE Me. Remember that:)

My friend Chelsea took such beautiful pictures of that day that accomplish exactly what I hoped they would. They help me RE-LIVE and FEEL the emotions and overwhelming happiness that surrounded their birth when looking at them. I am indebted to her forever for being there and being a part of that day. Chelsea- Thank you a million times over. It means the world to me.

Although their birthday didn't go anything like I had pictured and HOPED it would...I am still so fond of the memories and feelings I had surrounding that special day.

Their birth was very difficult and proved to be the hardest thing I've ever done.
I think it is safe to assume that I experienced every emotion that day!

Because of the circumstances...I didn't get to see or hold my babies after they were born. I thought that I would be sad or envious of the beautiful birth photos that capture those first few moments when mother meets child....but I wasn't. I guess it comes down to LOVING YOUR EXPERIENCE.

This is their birth story through my eyes...
The story of how they entered this life and became MINE forever.
My twins birth story doesn't only include May 23, 2012...their actual birthday...but rather a culmination of the hope and excitement and hardships that consumed our life for the 2.5 years prior to their birthday. It all played a part in painting the picture of that moment....the moment Dr. Hartman held up my 2nd child...BABY A (London Kate) and said... "Hi Mom!" and then only one minute later when he held up my 3rd child...BABY B (Mason James) and we officially became a family of Five.
You bet that I believe with every part of me that WAITING and WORKING so hard for them made their birthday and every day leading up to it feel more like a VICTORY and made everything more and more special to me.
So let's rewind a bit.....
On Thursday May 3rd, 2012 I was pushing my body as fast as it would go. Every part of my body was in physical pain and I knew that the swelling and cramping I was experiencing wasn't a great sign. However, I am so ridiculously stubborn that I refused to accept that my body was done. My brain wasn't so I pushed forward:) I vividly remember getting onto all fours to dust the under portion of my coffee table...all the while thinking about how I SHOULD NOT BE ATTEMPTING TO DO THIS! I didn't needed to be done and I wasn't going to have someone do it for me:) I wanted things to be perfect and ready for you to come home so badly. I hired Aunt Maren to teach preschool that morning because bending and lifting and teaching 24 THREE year olds was proving to be too difficult in my condition. I also had another doctors appointment to monitor your heart rates and assess your growth that afternoon and I was excited to see you...again! seemed to be hogging the food and little London was measuring a bit smaller than you mommy had to LIVE at the doctors office it seemed!
That morning I ran a few errands and then hugged and kissed Jaxson while dropping him off at the neighbors. I remember kissing his lips and feeling him hug me around the neck...then I watched him jump from the car and wave. I rolled down the window as he ran toward his friends front door and I shouted to him a promise that I would be back in ONE HOUR from the doctor and that I would take him to get a slurpee. I apologized to him for how often I was at the doctors office and told him that we'd have a special movie night...just the three of us...when I returned.

I never returned.

When I got to McKay Dee Hospital that afternoon...I knew that I was progressing...but DENIAL would be a good word to define how I felt. I had too much to do. I had TONS to do actually! I needed to finish up preschool and my obligations with my Job. I needed to spend some promised quality time with my son before life changed so drastically for him and ME. I needed to sew swaddle blankets and clean and set up swings and get things in order because that's how I work best: when things are organized and ready. My husband just had knee surgery the week prior and he couldn't even walk without crutches...I needed to take care of HIM!

THEN I could be in Labor...but NOT now. Not at 30 weeks. That wasn't part of my plan.
That was way TOO early. I made up my mind that I wouldn't let it happen.
I made it up to the fourth floor and got all hooked up to my stress-test monitors. I was growing rather used to them and had been doing them every 3 days for over a month.
They all showed the same thing: that you were both healthy and growing!
That particular day I was monitored and given a two thumbs up for how great you were doing.
I was sent on my way.
Only....I knew in my heart that things weren't right. I knew that I should insist he check me.
I continued to ask questions and he continued to assure me that everything I was experiencing was normal.
I wanted it to be NORMAL so that I could leave that hospital and pick up your older brother like I had promised him. Only I knew in that moment...that I wasn't going anywhere.
I had fought too long and too hard to let anything happen to you.
I was broken hearted...but I told Dr. Hartman that you two were coming and moments later he performed an ultrasound and confirmed what I knew: My body was ready to be done.
Within 30 minutes I was being admitted to Ogden Regional Hospital.
I was ordered to start Steroid shots within the hour to mature your little lungs and was diagnosed as in
Pre-Term Labor. It felt more like FULL BLOWN labor to me...but what do I know?!? :)


When I arrived at the hospital...I was immediately hooked up to monitors. My contractions were large and coming every 5-6 minutes.
I was given steroid shots and immediately started on a drug that relaxed my uterus and helped prevent it from contracting as intensely. The drug did not completely prevent labor but it helped slow the contractions enough to stop me from progressing. That's what they hoped:) At that point we were trying to "buy time"....every day counted immensely.

The morning after arriving at the hospital I came down with a horrible virus/sinus infection.
Hospitals aren't the cleanest/healthiest places come to find out.
Did you know that you can get more sick in a hospital than anywhere else??? It's true.
I cried for the next 7 days straight.
I literally laid in that hospital bed and sobbed and begged to go home for a solid week!
Every nurse would hug me and do their best to console me.
I was a mess.
I didn't want you to come out!
I didn't want to be away from daddy.
I absolutely felt guilt beyond description for being away from your brother Jaxson.
I was in Labor. It hurt.
I couldn't breathe or walk or sleep!

I wanted it to be over...but I knew that there wasn't a quick fix. You both needed TIME. You needed to grow and stay put for WEEKS and the only way that was going to happen was if I was confined to a hospital bed and fed handfuls of drugs every 4 hours around the clock!
I just couldn't imagine how I was going to live there for weeks.
I was poked and stabbed and given handfuls of drugs and spent hours hooked up to monitors every single day. Every tuesday I was wheeled in my wheelchair down to see the perinanatologist. Every day the concensus was the same...I had to stay.
It wasn't until the 2nd week of confinement that I accepted room 505 as my new home:)

I realized that I felt comfortable and safe there. I fell in love with the staff...the nurses...the maids...the housekeeping ladies who brought me fresh towels every morning and the guy who brought me breakfast, lunch and dinner for a month...even the phlebotomists who drew my blood every morning at 4:00 a.m. :) I'm not kidding...they want the blood results back by the time the doctors arrive at 6:00 a.m. to check on their they will walk in and flip on the lights and start drawing blood every morning at 4:00 a.m. Not fun! I even grew fond of the Chefs Salad and the cheesecake on the room service menu. They also made a mean yogurt parfait with granola;)

After 14 days of fevers, high blood pressure and the virus from hell not improving one tiny bit they finally prescribed me a Z-pack. Did you know that I took over $7,000.00 worth of meds during my stay:) Yep...sure did.
Grandma and Grandpa would bring Jaxson to visit during the week and on Sundays we would take him to the Ronald Mcdonald house at the hospital to watch movies and play the wii.
I watched your big brother grow up tremendously during that time. He became so independant and although he missed me...he was being so good and so brave while he was passed from place to place while I was away. Since your birth I have noticed huge changes in him....and I definitely recognize that I missed a month in his life. He CHANGED while I was gone and it was hard on me. During that month my baby became the "Big Brother". YOUR big brother! That little boy went through a lot. FOR YEARS. He watched as his mom changed before his eyes and became completely incapable of doing the things that he was used to. He was ok with it all....because he had been waiting and excited for YOU both to join our family. That big brother of yours will be your best friend and biggest fan...You watch!

As days slowly passed by...I found myself trying to be a "Wife" and "MOM" away from home. I paid the bills, registered Jaxson for soccer next season and did all I could to feel "normal" and forget that 1. I lived in at Ogden Regional, 2. Daddy slept in a recliner...and 3. I was in LABOR.
It was rather difficult!

 I love being being bedridden was rough. Everyone who called or visited asked how on earth I was surviving! The truth: even the most productive person on the planet gets tired and worn out and downright lazy when they are 9 months pregnant with TWO HUMANS.

One thing you should know about me and dad is we do everything together. When I was admitted to the was your dad. His shaving kit lived on the counter in the bathroom...his dress clothes and ties hung on the hook on the door. The recliner in the corner was made up like a bed...complete with sheets and pillows and every morning when the maids and nurses changed my bedding they changed his too:) They would watch him leave for work...and come home to me each night.
We do EVERYTHING together. It will always be that way. I owe your health and my ability to live through that experience mainly to your dad and how good he takes care of me. We are a team.

On May 11th, 2012 I broke out of the hospital to host my Smarty Pants Preschool graduation.
Against every rule imaginable...I told my nurses that I went for a "walk" to the cafeteria. The truth: daddy drove me to Layton at approximately 100 miles per hour. I had 4 hours to host 2 graduation ceremonies and be back in my bed to take my MEDS: the meds that kept my body from contracting:)

The entire graduation was planned by ME...from my hospital bed and EXECUTED by my assistant Jenn and my MOTHER (who saved my life:) It was the most stressful thing imaginable for me. The culmination of all of my work for OVER a year coming to an end...THAT NIGHT.
I was 200 pounds and I got to host a ceremony in front of a room full of people. WHY ME?!?!?!
My cankles were impossible to describe.
I have pictures to prove it.

I seriously had an anxiety attack driving back to the hospital that evening.
I hadn't seen the outside world in 11 days.
I missed my bed and my house and my family.
I didn't know when it would be over!
It could be could be could be months.

I was literally convinced that evening for the FIRST TIME that the hospital was where I NEEDED to be. That I swallowed my drugs and climbed into my horribly uncomfortable hospital bed....I felt safe. I was grateful for an inspired doctor who KNEW what was best for me and for YOUR health.

The next morning I woke up with Pink Eye.
Serious. I couldn't make this stuff up:)
Let the fun continue!!

I thought only 4 year olds got pink eye. Then I realized that they DO....and that is most likely where I got it....from my little preschoolers. My immune system was down from the horrible 2.5 week virus that had about killed me and rumor had it that PINK EYE was rapidly spreading through my preschoolers after graduation.
Lucky Lucky me.

I was started on antibiotics and eye drops.

That week was also my birthday.
I spent my 28th birthday ALONE, sick and with Pink Eye. Oh yah...I was in labor too.
That day was my all time low.
I think I slept for 8 hours straight that day.
I only woke up to eat....and do my usual testing/blood draws.
I called Jarom periodically throughout the day and sobbed like a lunatic.

Mother's Day was also pretty depressing. I was too tired to have a pity I ordered room service and watched a movie on my laptop:)....Dad bought be beautiful flowers and wrote me a super sweet letter about how amazing I was. Because of my current condition and circumstances I agreed with him. Ha!

Jaxson came to visit me and brought me a darling gift. He bought me pink heart earrings from Walmart:) haha. He insisted on them because he wanted me to wear them and remember that he loved me while we were apart. He.Is.The.Sweetest.

The following week I was finally starting to feel better from my sinus infection.

I would spend the afternoons watching episode after episode of "A Baby Story" on TLC....and I would, of course, order room service. I started to relax and spend time each day thinking about the two of you...what I wanted to name you...and when you'd come! At that point I knew I wasn't leaving that hospital until you were I was constantly wondering how and when it would happen.

I spent hours writing my thoughts in a journal and filling out details in each of your baby books!
Day after Day went by and each day that you were inside felt like a small victory. I thought a lot about Jaxson and how he was such a perfect mix of me and your dad....and wondered what little personalities you would bring to our family. I was and still am in shock that I have a little girl! It was impossible to imagine. London- what and who would you look like? Would you have hair? Your dad's blue eyes? Mason- would you steal my heart as completely and quickly as your big brother did? Would you have BIG EYES like he did?

I was growing so excited to finally meet you.
I couldn't believe that you started out in a dish:) haha.

I thought a lot about how you were obviously MEANT to come to me at the same time...and why that may be?!? I have always been excited for the two of you to have each other.


Then May 22nd rolled around.
I was busy eating my french toast breakfast and watching something exciting like "Keeping up with Kardashians"....(for the record...I NEVER watch TV and so all of these hours SITTING was a whole new experience for me!) when my personal shaffuere arrived at my door. He was also one of my many new friends....who's job was to escort me via my wheelchair to the Perinatologist. We made jokes about how many miles he logged each day pushing fat people like me around the winding halls of that place:)

That appointment changed everything.

My specialist was worried about my health. He told me that I had done everything I could to keep you healthy and strong and he assured me that you both were perfect. After weighing our options and discussing your health vs. mine...he decided that it was time to quit "preventing" my Labor.

It was a long ride back to my room.
He told me that it could still take weeks before you were born.
I knew in my heart you would be here soon.

I never took another pill and that night I climbed into bed knowing that this was it.
I was scared. I was excited. I felt guilty for not holding you in longer.
I felt a wide range of you can imagine.

The contractions started immediately for me and went throughout the night. When I awoke I was quite uncomfortable...but by that point I was ALWAYS I was unsure what all this new pain meant.

Dad climbed into my tiny hospital bed and squished beside my HUGE body.
I told him about my long long night. I told him that I thought you were coming.
We talked for a bit and I knew it was time to call a nurse.

The nurse hooked me up to the monitors that I'd grown VERY accustomed to...and we started to monitor my contractions. I was having LARGE and INTENSE contractions every 9 to 10 minutes.
This confused everyone. In active labor you expect contractions to be closer together. If and when the contractions are closer together you will start progressing. With contractions that far apart...they were convinced that I was just having the usual "twin pregnancy" braxton hicks and that, although painful, they weren't making me progress. Nurse after Nurse told me that it would most likely go on like this for days. I was quite emotional about that.

Daddy decided to shower and head to work. He kept saying..."False Alarm".
I was feeling rather defeated at that moment.
I was starting to believe the doctors and nurses instead of trust in my body and my instinct.

Dad kissed me and left...and once again, I was sitting alone in my hospital pain...with no end in sight. My doctor arrived and talked with me. I told him that I was in Labor and that you were coming.

I'll never forget what he said.
He told me that there was NO WAY on earth that I'd be capable of calmly having this conversation with him...if I was actually in labor enough to be progressing.

Nobody wanted to check me for fear that it would trigger labor. I was already pregnant with high risk twins that would be premature if born that day. Not worth the risk basically:)

When he left the room I ripped those monitors off and hopped in the shower.
I didn't care what they said...I knew you were coming soon...and I wanted to be presentable for our first meeting! I shaved my legs and washed my hair and applied some makeup before I KNEW that it was time to call the nurses again. I paiged my nurse and she entered my room...shocked to see my hair dripping wet and me freshly showered.

The last picture of me and the TWINS inside:)
(Taken only a few hours before my c-section...while I was in labor and nobody believed me:)

"I really really want you to check me please. I know what you and the doctor have said...but trust me when I say....I NEED TO BE CHECKED. "

My sweet nurse decided to trust me.

20 seconds later she stood up from my bedside and said into her Pager...
"Charge Dr. hartman now."

I saw her face and immediately knew I was right.
I was a 7...almost an 8.
I win.

I jumped out of bed...
 " I just need to round brush my hair...I look awful!" I said to my nurse.

She laughed and responded....
" don't have the time."

....and just like that the anesthesiologist burst into my room and I was prepped for surgery....

My room was swarming with people.

I couldn't believe it was time.
It all happened so fast.
I called Dad and reached him JUST as he was arriving at work.

I remember saying to him "Honey...if you want to see better drive fast!"

I, of course, called grandma and told her it was time! She asked how long she had to get there...
and the nurse shouted...
"Your babies will be out within the hour."

I wasn't ready.
I had wet hair.
I wasn't ready.
I didn't want a C-section.
I wasn't ready.


I was SOOOO Excited to meet you.

It hit me: Everyone that was rushing around my room was worried that you were coming out the old fashioned way:)

( hurt as badly as it looks:)

Which I would have liked...except that were breech.
As in FEET FIRST. No Thanks.


Getting a Spinal wasn't the funnest thing that's ever happened to me...but it definitely wasn't the worst thing I've experienced in pregnancy:) A few minutes later I was joking with Dr. Hartman and apologizing that he had to see me naked. ha!

I was very shocked at how fast things went. I was busy shooting countless questions at the anesthesiologist about how numb I should be. Call me crazy...but I DID NOT want to feel my stomach being cut open. The whole c-section idea was a bit intimidating. I kept saying to him..."pinch me and let's do a test! Wait wait a second..I'm pretty sure I can still feel it!"

Come to find out...the incision had already been made and were almost born!!!

I felt A LOT of pushing....a surprising amount of pushing and leaning on my chest and tugging. Oh the Tugging. Why they don't warn you that ONE doctor will be pulling on your child's head and ONE will literally be laying with all of his force on your upper abdomen is beyond me?!?

Moments later...London...YOU were held up over the sheet and I heard you cry.
Dr. Hartman said, "HI MOM!" as he held you up and just like that you were rushed away to the NICU. I tried so hard to memorize what you looked like. I knew you were small...but you were screaming and looked so healthy. I was sooo happy!

That is the last memory I have.

Mason....I love you with all of my heart...but I seriously do NOT remember one thing from that moment until later that evening. Dad promises that they held you up just one short minute after yours sister and that I cried and GRINNED...but my mind is BLANK.

(The assistant surgeon came out in the hall and gave grandma a thumbs up!
He said.."We have babies!!")

Grandma was OBVIOUSLY exited:)

She called and text everyone!

Dad was still in his suit and tie...straight from work.
He barely had enough time to get there:)

Chelsea snapped this right after he watched you be born:)

I wasn't feeling well enough to visit you quite daddy kept showing me pictures of you.
I was in shock I think:) Everything happened so fast! I had waited and anticipated this moment for sooo long...and within 45 minutes it was over and you were HERE.

I was quite emotional about the whole thing.
If I cry....grandma cries:)
So we have lots of fun pictures of the two of us bawling like babies:)

I think your daddy was in shock too.
Everyone told me later that he sat in the rocking chair by my bedside and didn't say much for the remainder of the day:) He could also tell that I was sick and that something wasn't quite right with me...but he didn't know what. I can tell by this picture that he was a little worried:)
Scroll down for more details!!!

I have small bits and pieces of memory...but mostly NOTHING.
Not the PERFECT ENDING you were picturing now is it???
haha!!'s TRUE.

Come to find out I was low on in REALLY low. So low that my brain wasn't getting enough oxygen (no memory) and shortly after...I developed double vision and couldn't focus.
 The problems kept on coming and it felt like I was fighting with all of my strength to stay alert and awake...but it wasn't working. Daddy knew something was wrong...but couldn't figure out what. He knew that I'd been through a he didn't say much...but he knew.

Later that evening Daddy asked if I wanted to see the two of you.
I burst into tears and then told him NO.

It felt like I was in a bubble. Everything was in slow motion and I couldn't form the words that I wanted to say. I noticed that my speech was slurred and that I would fall to sleep in the middle of a sentence...I was also having a hard time remembering things and I would ask the same questions over and over. I lost my voice?!? My vision...and what felt like my SANITY.

One of my only memories is asking your uncle Ryan...who was closest to the garbage can... to kindly hold it under my chin while I felt like my insides wanted to be on the outside:) wow.
Ryan doesn't have kids yet...and so the whole thing made him a bit squimish:) haha!
He tossed the garbage at me and ran for the door.


It wasn't until the next evening that everyone realized something was seriously "OFF" with me and that I was struggling. They took my blood and realized that I was severely LOW. I had lost so much blood during surgery that I was blacking in and out.
 I do remember my phone ringing and hearing Dr. Hartman say...

" need a blood transfusion NOW. I don't have time to get to the the time I get there you'll have already fainted. Do you verbally consent to the risks over the phone?"

All I could think was...
"It's about time!!! Someone please help me!"

I literally felt like the only reason I was awake and alive was sheer determination.
I remember waking up in the middle of the night to pump and wandering the halls of the hospital trying desparately to remember where the NICU was so I could deliver the milk to my babies. When I finally found it...I couldn't remember how to get back. It was like I was trapped in slow motion. It was so awful. I just thought that c-sections were horrible...and that it must be normal:)
So I kept pushing through.

Needless to say, I was given multiple bags of blood and had transfusions all throughout the night.
I felt like a new woman by morning:)


The following night when I was feeling a bit better and could actually form sentences (dead serious) dad wheeled me down to the NICU to see you for the first time.
I was in heaven.

I spent the next few days learning everything there was to know about you!
I held you...and begged the nurses to let me get you out of your isolette's and nurse you.
I stared at you through the glass and tried to decide on a name for you both!!


 I loved the name LONDON for you and felt like it was such a good fit. It felt very Classy and Sweet. I could picture a darling little girl with pigtails and a beautiful young woman with confidence. It was surreal to finally have a daughter. I couldn't believe how much you looked like your dad. You were perfectly healthy and strong and breathing on your own. I LOVED to sit by your isolette and stare at you.

Mason...truth be told I wanted to name you Boston. Daddy wasn't a fan. Due to his obsession with baseball and his undying love and support for the Chicago Cubs...he wouldn't allow me to name you after the Boston Red Socks. No way. It wasn't happening. He liked the name Mason...and I loved it too! It felt like the perfect fit to our family and sounded great with your brother and sister:
Jaxson, Mason & London was hard for me to see you in the NICU.  I would stand several feet away from your isolette and just sob. Sometimes I would pull a nurse aside and ask a million questions about you and your stats. I needed to know how much oxygen you needed and what your respirations were at for the day. I was obsessed with keeping everything for you and your sister many CC's you were drinking, your bilirubin levels, if you could maintain your body temperature, etc.
I hated that you were struggling more than your sister. I hated that I couldn't fix it.


After 4 days of trying to heal, pumping all day and night and spending hours each day in the NICU getting SO MUCH INFORMATION thrown at me I couldn't keep in straight...I was mentally done.

I didn't realize how hard it would be to keep all the information separate for TWO.
It's almost like I equated my ability to be a good mother with my ability to know EVERYTHING about BOTH of you at all times. It just wasn't possible with narcotics and IVpain meds rushing through my system:) I was severely anemic and swollen and had dagerously high blood pressure and I was pushing my body to it's absolute limits. I was so worried about the two of you... I forgot to worry about me.

I woke up on day 5 with a massive cold sore from all the stress.
I wasn't happy about it at all....but I was only awake for about 15 minutes when I realized that COLD SORES meant I couldn't go to the NICU to see you.

I was a mess. I. Fell. Apart.


It was that morning that the Doctor and Daddy decided to get me out of that hospital for good.
My doctor said that the hospital had been my home for TOO LONG and that I needed to go home, heal and sleep in my own bed for the first time in 6 weeks. He said that I was going to continue to get worse until I got out of that place...and that it would be best for my health and my sanity to go home with Jaxson where I belonged.

It was very difficult to leave you two there.
It was difficult not getting to kiss you goodbye.
...but I had physically and mentally given everything I could give.
So dad loaded up my things and held my hand as we drove away without you.

It was hard.
I went through A drive away empty handed.
I was broken hearted.
But...daddy took good care of me:)


I spent the next few days getting royal treatment:) I laid in my bed and daddy pampered me and fed me and did anything I asked. A few days later Jaxson came home and I was able to spend some much needed ONE-ON-ONE time with your big brother. It felt like a part of me was physically missing for 8 straight days while I tried to heal and get well enough to come and see you...but it was so refreshing to finally be HOME.

Looking back I realize that our Heavenly Father absolutely knows what's best for us. He truly knew what was best for me when I was FORCED to stay away for a few days and focus on me. I needed to heal and get prepared to bring you both home. I would have never eased up or slept or STOPPED obsessing over you two and your health unless I wasn't given a choice. Nothing could have kept me away from you. I think he knew that.


The day I was able to visit again was very special for me.
Dad and I took our time rocking you and feeding you.

I thought A LOT about how TIME can heal so many things.
One week earlier I was devastated and exhausted.
The day I held you again...I felt energetic and happiness beyond compare.

I knew that I needed that time.
I was grateful for that time.

because that time allowed me the space and separation from the stress that I needed to be a better mother.

I was ready for you to come home.
I was healed enough to be the Mother I wanted to be.
...and for that I was so grateful.


The day you were born was the best day ever.
The entire process (and it was a LONG 2.5 year process) of getting you here was finally over.  I felt such relief the day we buckled you in and drove away...headed for home.

We were finally a family of FIVE.
Thank you for choosing me to be your Mother.
I'm falling short on a daily basis...but I promise you that nobody could love you more.



The Wells Family said...

Love, love, love! What an amazing, hard, special experience! Thank you for sharing. :)

Ally said...

Sobs:) congrats again, and again...and again.

Jamie said...

I LOVE THIS:) Thanks for sharing:)